Join us this holiday season for 10 days of wanking for peace. Each day we will masturbate in a special way, symbolizing one aspect of our peace movement.
On the first day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To masturbate for all humanity.
On the second day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To jack off with my left hand
And to masturbate for all humanity.
On the third day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To use both hands for pleasure,
Jack off with my left hand,
And to masturbate for all humanity.
On the fourth day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To play with my sex toys,
Use both hands for pleasure,
Jack off with my left hand,
And to masturbate for all humanity.
On the fifth day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To STAND UP FOR PEACE…
Play with my sex toys,
Use both hands for pleasure,
Jack off with my left hand,
And to masturbate for all humanity.
On the sixth day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To jill off sitting down,
STAND UP FOR PEACE…
Play with my sex toys,
Use both hands for pleasure,
Jack off with my left hand,
And to masturbate for all humanity.
On the seventh day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To postpone orgasm,
Jill off sitting down,
STAND UP FOR PEACE…
Play with my sex toys,
Use both hands for pleasure,
Jack off with my left hand,
And to masturbate for all humanity.
On the eighth day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To cum very loudly,
Postpone orgasm,
Jill off sitting down,
STAND UP FOR PEACE…
Play with my sex toys,
Use both hands for pleasure,
Jack off with my left hand,
And to masturbate for all humanity.
On the ninth day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To touch myself in nature,
Cum very loudly,
Postpone orgasm,
Jill off sitting down,
STAND UP FOR PEACE…
Play with my sex toys,
Use both hands for pleasure,
Jack off with my left hand,
And to masturbate for all humanity.
On the tenth day of wanking
My peaceful pledge will be
To whack off with a friend,
Touch myself in nature,
Cum very loudly,
Postpone orgasm,
Jill off sitting down,
STAND UP FOR PEACE…
Play with my sex toys,
Use both hands for pleasure,
Jack off with my left hand,
And to masturbate for all humanity.
Jingle Balls
Jacking in the snow
For peace this holiday
Dick in hand you go
Shooting out a spray
Stroking by the gate
As Santa’s sleigh takes flight
What fun it is to masturbate
For peace on Christmas night
Masturbate
Masturbate
Do it for the cause
We all want peace instead of war
And so does Santa Claus
Masturbate
Masturbate
Even in the cold
Shooting cum instead of guns
Is best for young and old
A stroke or two won’t do
So pull it fast and strong
Letting out a moan
As you yank on your dong
Cry out nice and loud
When you beat for peace
Do it with a great big crowd
To make the fighting cease
Masturbate
Masturbate
Do it for the cause
We all want peace instead of war
And so does Santa Claus
Masturbate
Masturbate
Even in the cold
Shooting cum instead of guns
Is best for young and old…
Wankin’ in a Winter Wonderland
Joyful moans, are you list’nin?
In your hand, cum is glist’nin
We’ll keep peace in sight
as we beat tonight
Wankin’ in a winter wonderland!
Gone away, bombs and conflicts
Here to stay, lube and hard dicks
You twiddle your clit
and war takes a hit
Wankin’ in a winter wonderland!
In the meadow we can build a snowman
Then pretend that he’s a general
He’ll say, “Are you fighting?”
We’ll say, “No, man!
We’re cumming for the greatest cause of all!”
Later on we’ll conspire
With our loins all a-fire
We’re stamping out hate
as we masturbate
Wankin’ in a winter wonderland!
When you cum, ain’t it happy
Though your pubes get all chappy
We’ll frolic and play
the onanist way
Wankin’ in a winter wonderland!
Wankin’ in a winter wonderland!
Viagra, Oh Viagra
Viagra, Oh Viagra
When you need a boner
Get a prescription
And put in your order
Just gulp down the Blue Pill, you’ll get a treat
You’ll have an erection you cannot beat
There’s lots of positions
That you and the wife can explore
Your sex life’s revived, but don’t be surprised
The next morning when you wake up sore
Viagra, Oh Viagra
The greatest invention
Helping you blow off
Your sexual tension
Erectile dysfunction won’t stand a chance
When it does its magic inside of your pants
Your sexual prowess
Will put the wind back in your sails
Hold onto your dick, it will give your putz a kick
You can use that thing for driving nails
Viagra, Oh Viagra
Restoring your ardor
Just when you think
It can’t get any harder
You pop another stiffy, your pole is like steel
You feel like a porn star, your girlfriend will squeal
Increase your endurance
You won’t want to turn off the light
The sex is the best, but you won’t get much rest
Now that you can keep it up all night